Countdown

16 days and counting! We went to my doctor appointment yesterday and scheduled the C-section for January 28! It was the date that we had wanted, but weren't sure if we would get because it is 11 days before my due date. January 28 happens to fall on a Friday which happens to be an OR day for Dr. Rosenbaum, so we had a chance that she would let us choose that date. Dr. Rosenbaum had been leaning towards February 1, that would have been only a week early and when she prefers to perform elect C-sections, at 39 weeks (and also an OR day). It's a very silly reason that we were hoping for January 28, but we are kinda silly people. Chris and I were both born on the 29th day of the month (February - me, December - Chris). Ryan was born on July 28. So, we thought it would be cool if both kids were born on the 28th day of their birth month. It also means that our kids will be exactly 18 months apart. Silly, we know, but kinda cool. We ended up getting what we wished for- thanks to the large baby that is growing inside of me and my rising blood pressure. I had hoped my blood pressure would have come down a bit since I hadn't worked for 4 consecutive days. It hadn't. It was exactly the same as the previous week. I started to panic when the nurse told me it was still high. I was so worried that Dr. Rosenbaum was going to send me back to the ER and that I may never go home! Thankfully this did not happen. Although there was an increase in protein in my 24 hour urine, as compared to early in my pregnancy, and my bp was still elevated, she did not put me on lock down! She did let us schedule our C-section and she also let me know what would earn me a trip to the OR earlier than January 28. As long as the baby keeps doing well (we got another 8/8 on the biophysical sono!), and my bp doesn't reach the severe high (160/110) at my two next apointments then Jan. 28 is our day. If the babies score decreases or I reach the severe high blood pressure levels I will be delivered that day.
So, the doctor appointment went well and we got what we wanted. So, why did I start crying when we got to the car?????? WHO KNOWS! I am just thankful that Chris did not drop me off at Parkland Hospital's 8N Floor (psych ward). I guess it was just the reality that the end/beginning is near. Of course the guilt factor that I only had 17 days to focus solely on Ryan reappeared in my head. And then, there is the fear of abdominal surgery and trying to recover while caring for 2 babies. I also felt a sadness that I wouldn't be pregnant anymore. I wouldn't feel the baby move inside of me or have the comfort of knowing that the baby is safe and with me all the time. It all became a little overwhelming and I suddenly thought we should delay the date. I asked Chris if I should call and bump it back! Sweet, patient Chris told me to do whatever I want and whatever I feel is best. So, then I went back and forth trying to decide. Ultimately we (I) decided to stick with our plan. Because of my blood pressure and the fact that our baby is already so big there is really no reason to bump it back. I am now officially excited! Can't wait to meet Emma Reese or Luke Austin!
I am well aware that I will most likely have a breakdown/panic attack on January 27th, but Chris wouldn't expect anything less from me! He may also have me transferred directly from the 2nd floor of Parkland (OR) to 8N after the birth. Please come visit!